Why the “those who can’t do, teach” system works
Isn’t it a little crazy that record-breaking athletes—pioneers of their sport—are coached by people who can’t hold a candle to them? I mean it applies to almost all kinds of athletes, even those at your local high school’s football team. High-performers are coached by people who can’t do what they tell their athletes to do. Some could at one point in their lives, and t-ball coaches still can.
But for the most part, you’ve got old Mr. Coach out there, squinting, as they watch their athlete serve the ball. Then they yell out something like, “You’re not hitting the serve at the top of your jump. Try again!” Old Mr. Coach can’t even jump. And yet…
And yet, this kind of coaching works. It’s helped plenty of athletes reach new heights.
Why?
Well, there’s more than one factor of course. But…
PERSPECTIVE IS ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT ELEMENTS IN EFFECTIVE COACHING
A coach knows what success looks like, and their seat on the sidelines gives them the right perspective. They’re perfectly positioned to see where the improvements should be, to tell when things align correctly, etc.
And athletes value coaching. They appreciate that perspective because it’s pretty much impossible for them to get all on their own; and they know it’s key to improvement.
This applies to high-performers in all aspects of life. High performers crave improvement and need coaching.
HERE ARE SOME IDEAS FOR GETTING COACHING OR PERSPECTIVE, SO YOU CAN KEEP GROWING PROFESSIONALLY
Coaching from a direct manager
Your direct manager is best-positioned to be your coach. They consistently see your work and its place in the wider world. Plus, they have personal motivations for your performance to improve.
If you have a good relationship with your manager and you respect them, then you are in the prime position to get a ton out of a coaching relationship with your manager. If that’s you, but you aren’t getting good coaching right now, then odds are communication is your hurdle.
- Tell them your expectations
- Tell them your career goals
- Ask for feedback
- Set up regular meetings to discuss your progress
What to do when you don’t have an A+ relationship with your direct manager
If you don’t have a good relationship with your manager, give up. 😅 Ok don’t give up; but you should seriously consider doing what’s in your power to change that.
- Voice your concerns to your manager.
- Work to build more trust and respect.
- If that doesn’t work, talk to the next-tier supervisor and voice your concerns about the relationship. Discuss your options for a change in team or position.
- Consider a different job.
A bad relationship with your manager is a big handicap to your career and happiness.
But as far as coaching, try it out with them. Give them a chance to surprise you. Allow coaching to be an opportunity to grow that respect and trust between the two of you.
👇Then, use some of these other ways to also get perspective on your work. 👇
Getting team perspective.
Send a quick message to a trusted team member.
Example:
Hey, I’ve been working really hard on my writing skills so I can get that Senior Copywriter promotion in August. 💪🤞Do you mind helping me learn more about my writing, so I can keep improving? In that writing sample I attached, how do you feel I did at keeping things concise while keeping the context understandable?
When you reach out, be really clear about why you want the feedback and exactly what feedback you want.
Watch film
I had never heard of watching film before marrying a football dude (Josh, text me now to prove you’re carefully reading my newsletter today 😉). But it turns out that watching film is a common and important part of most athletes’ training.
Athletes watch videos of themselves, their teams, and their competitors all the time. They can analyze their performance because of the perspective the camera offers, which they don’t have while they’re actively competing or performing. What I’m getting at is this: you don’t always need to rely on other people to get perspective on your performance.
So how can we get a useful perspective on our work through self-evaluation? Because most of us are self-analyzing our performance all the freaking time. But often when personal evaluation is left to just haphazard internal commentary throughout our work day, it will mostly be negative, undirected, and fueled by our insecurities.
So instead, I recommend creating a 15-minute meeting with yourself twice a month. Have a set of questions like this that you refer to:
- What do I want from my job/career?
- Do I still want the same things from and for my career?
- What do I need to do to achieve that 👆?
- What’s been hindering me from those goals?
- What’s been enabling me to reach them?
- Does my job energize and invigorate me?
- What can I change to make my job more fulfilling?
- What should continue/stop/start/change to reach my goals?
- How will I keep track of my progress in the area I want to improve?
GROUND YOURSELF IN CONFIDENCE TO AVOID GETTING DEFENSIVE
You’ll get best at filtering and applying feedback the more you have a healthy self-confidence. So always be working on that.
Isn’t it a little crazy that record-breaking athletes—pioneers of their sport—are coached by people who can’t hold a candle to them? I mean it applies to almost all kinds of athletes, even those at your local high school’s football team. High-performers are coached by people who can’t do what they tell their athletes to do. Some could at one point in their lives, and t-ball coaches still can.
But for the most part, you’ve got old Mr. Coach out there, squinting, as they watch their athlete serve the ball. Then they yell out something like, “You’re not hitting the serve at the top of your jump. Try again!” Old Mr. Coach can’t even jump. And yet…
And yet, this kind of coaching works. It’s helped plenty of athletes reach new heights.
Why?
Well, there’s more than one factor of course. But…
PERSPECTIVE IS ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT ELEMENTS IN EFFECTIVE COACHING
A coach knows what success looks like, and their seat on the sidelines gives them the right perspective. They’re perfectly positioned to see where the improvements should be, to tell when things align correctly, etc.
And athletes value coaching. They appreciate that perspective because it’s pretty much impossible for them to get all on their own; and they know it’s key to improvement.
This applies to high-performers in all aspects of life. High performers crave improvement and need coaching.
HERE ARE SOME IDEAS FOR GETTING COACHING OR PERSPECTIVE, SO YOU CAN KEEP GROWING PROFESSIONALLY
Coaching from a direct manager
Your direct manager is best-positioned to be your coach. They consistently see your work and its place in the wider world. Plus, they have personal motivations for your performance to improve.
If you have a good relationship with your manager and you respect them, then you are in the prime position to get a ton out of a coaching relationship with your manager. If that’s you, but you aren’t getting good coaching right now, then odds are communication is your hurdle.
- Tell them your expectations
- Tell them your career goals
- Ask for feedback
- Set up regular meetings to discuss your progress
What to do when you don’t have an A+ relationship with your direct manager
If you don’t have a good relationship with your manager, give up. 😅 Ok don’t give up; but you should seriously consider doing what’s in your power to change that.
- Voice your concerns to your manager.
- Work to build more trust and respect.
- If that doesn’t work, talk to the next-tier supervisor and voice your concerns about the relationship. Discuss your options for a change in team or position.
- Consider a different job.
A bad relationship with your manager is a big handicap to your career and happiness.
But as far as coaching, try it out with them. Give them a chance to surprise you. Allow coaching to be an opportunity to grow that respect and trust between the two of you.
👇Then, use some of these other ways to also get perspective on your work. 👇
Getting team perspective.
Send a quick message to a trusted team member.
Example:
Hey, I’ve been working really hard on my writing skills so I can get that Senior Copywriter promotion in August. 💪🤞Do you mind helping me learn more about my writing, so I can keep improving? In that writing sample I attached, how do you feel I did at keeping things concise while keeping the context understandable?
When you reach out, be really clear about why you want the feedback and exactly what feedback you want.
Watch film
I had never heard of watching film before marrying a football dude (Josh, text me now to prove you’re carefully reading my newsletter today 😉). But it turns out that watching film is a common and important part of most athletes’ training.
Athletes watch videos of themselves, their teams, and their competitors all the time. They can analyze their performance because of the perspective the camera offers, which they don’t have while they’re actively competing or performing. What I’m getting at is this: you don’t always need to rely on other people to get perspective on your performance.
So how can we get a useful perspective on our work through self-evaluation? Because most of us are self-analyzing our performance all the freaking time. But often when personal evaluation is left to just haphazard internal commentary throughout our work day, it will mostly be negative, undirected, and fueled by our insecurities.
So instead, I recommend creating a 15-minute meeting with yourself twice a month. Have a set of questions like this that you refer to:
- What do I want from my job/career?
- Do I still want the same things from and for my career?
- What do I need to do to achieve that 👆?
- What’s been hindering me from those goals?
- What’s been enabling me to reach them?
- Does my job energize and invigorate me?
- What can I change to make my job more fulfilling?
- What should continue/stop/start/change to reach my goals?
- How will I keep track of my progress in the area I want to improve?
GROUND YOURSELF IN CONFIDENCE TO AVOID GETTING DEFENSIVE
You’ll get best at filtering and applying feedback the more you have a healthy self-confidence. So always be working on that.